We are being told 24/7 how vulnerable we are physically, and the more we hear it the more we feel that way. We all have so many questions but nobody really seems to have the answers.
When will my customers come back?
How will I pay my staff?
How will I pay my tax?
How will I support my family?
How can I find a new job?
Why is this happening?
Who is to blame?
Will I catch Corona virus?
When will my kids go back to school?
Does my mask match my beard?
Does anybody really know.
So, if you are feeling a little anxious and feeling vulnerable then you need to know it’s not abnormal, especially right now, it’s ok to feel this way.
120 years ago a famous Austrian Psychologist Alfred Adler stated that our thoughts and actions are taken in context of what we believe others think of us, and today this still rings very true. Unfortunately many people incorrectly see vulnerability as a weakness, which is why so few men are happy to show it.
The good news is it really is OK to feel vulnerable right now and most blokes would admit this. Emotions are running high for many with anger, frustration, worry and loneliness topping the polls at the moment.
Admitting vulnerability is good for you and a character strength. Denying yourself the right to feel vulnerable will make you feel physically weaker due to the stress it causes and how it plays on your mind. You won’t sleep, You won’t eat or exercise and as a result you will feel less enthused about life.
Men are not good at admitting they are struggling, from child hood we are told be tough, don’t cry, get on with it. This goes a long way to explaining why men find talking about feeling vulnerable so hard. Logically, you know that everyone gets down, and has a problem from time to time, but when it happens to you, it can feel like you are the only person who can’t seem to handle it. You lie awake at night alone, wondering why. Remember you are not alone, you are one of millions, not the only one.
Start to help yourself by talking to someone who understands. Experts in the field of Mental health continually tell us how much talking helps relieve the pressure, and that talking is the first step to feeling better and preventing bigger problems.
Like with any health issue the earlier the treatment the better the chances of success.
Opening up and showing vulnerability and talking about your stresses and anxiety can help in several ways.
- Simply, by telling someone you will feel a weight lifted from your shoulders, after all your head is on your shoulders
- There are people who know more about this than us. Other people may have practical advice and solutions to the issues keeping you up at night because they have probably been through it also at some point.
- You will feel less alone. While during Covid-19 you may be isolated, you will realise there are people who care and can help
- You will learn to better understand your emotions
- Talking can also help sort through your own thoughts, saying things out loud brings both order and perspective.
- You will feel more in control, and this enables your brain to calm and move on and focus on what you can do to help yourself.
It`s not just the health professionals that tell us how beneficial talking is, holder of 28 Olympic medals Michael Phelps says this about the importance of talking.
“For me, I basically carried just about every negative emotion you can possibly carry along for 15-20 years and I never talked about it. And I don’t know why that one day I decided to just open up. But since that day, it’s just been so much easier to live and so much easier to enjoy life and it’s something I’m very thankful for.”
So we implore you, even though you are a man don’t act like a man, admit you don`t have all the answers and talk to someone. If you are looking for help and advice or just a chat please reach out